What is it that God wants you to keep on reaching?
“He filled my life with good things
to make me young and strong
like an eagle.”
A question that baffled me yesterday when I was asked about it. I really don’t know what it is that He wants me to reach out, for I am clueless myself. I realized then that my relationship with the Lord is quite shallow, it’s not stable, it’s on/off whenever I wanted just like how I treat the people around me.
That time I uttered I wanted to have a strong foundation in terms of having a relationship with the Lord for I am tired of what I’ve been doing all this time. I keep on reaching out to Him when I felt sad and lonely but whenever He got too close I backed out, I don’t know why. Then she (Ate Rea, my spiritual leader) asked me, why am I afraid to go deeper? I didn’t answer that much but she somehow understands me and tell me why.
It was year 2011, when I encounter Jesus in a real and personal way through God’s Words (John 3:16). That’s when I truly understand how very important He is, as if I cannot live without hearing more of His Words. I have lots of questions in life that He can only answer. I seek Him more despite the obstacles around me. For the first time in my life, that’s when I felt so alive. My days become brighter and living the life I once dreaded becomes meaningful. I keep on reaching but when He’s almost close to reaching my heart, I runaway.
I never let anyone got too close but only near for I’ve built up these walls since I was a child. I only share a part of my life to the people around me for they never stayed. I’m ok with having just a few friends or none at all, I’m used to it. And somehow, the way I treat people becomes my response towards God. When it comes to Him, I’m just not sure about it. There are some things in my life I don’t wanted Him to change. Changing it means knocking off the walls I built for all these years. Reaching out to Him, means reaching out to people which I cannot even imagine. Reaching out to Him means going deeper and learning to depend on Him always. Reaching out to Him means sharing my life, what He has done for me. Reaching out to Him means doing things I’ve never done before. Reaching out to Him just means, it’s simply OK and just try. Do it this time and never back out.
Prayer Declaration: Just keep on reaching.